All of my colleagues have their own reasons to work in the adult industry (and this specific escorting agency) and no one, including myself, can judge them and their lives based on those reasons. The decision in itself is a bold one, you’ll have to agree with that. Not everyone is cut to do it and even those who are, find it terribly difficult to get into this business for a number of many other reasons, safety and dignity being the most relevant and serious of them all. I’m lucky indeed to work in a team of escorts that aren’t 100% driven by economic reasons when it comes to this business.

Why work as an escort, my top 8 personal reasons

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1. The money is good.

Coming from a background somewhere not far below the middle class, life seemed to provide me with less opportunities to pursue my happiness as I have defined it. I’ve always liked fancy clothes, fine wines and trendy furniture, it seemed only natural to try and invest into the lifestyle I longed for.

If there’s a job these days that it isn’t porn and it involves a high degree of understanding and acceptance for others and their desires, this must be it. And if you get paid properly for all that work and talent, I’d say I’m on the right track and McDonald’s can kiss my ass for wanting to make so much money out of it without rewarding me properly.

2. You get to shape your future.

It can be a dangerous choice if you end up with the wrong people, but this is not the rule anymore. If you work with a respectable agency or carefully selected clients you have the chance to work safely, keep your dignity, study, travel and put some funds aside for your first venture. All those people you’ve met and spoke with, all those awkward, funny and dull moments, all those days of enjoying who you are and hating our entire species for the humility you’ve been going through will add something to your life experience and your understanding about the world you are living in.

Of course, sometimes things do go south, being careful is still a must, no matter how well / bad life will treat you. This job is, nevertheless, more suited for strong personalities, people who like to be in control of their own lives and destiny, who are able to make tough decisions when the situation requires it, who like independence and know when to say “no” and when to negociate. I like to believe I’ve earned my status by now.

3. You have control over your life and the chance to change some things

You don’t need to resume your existence to sex and money – work and payment, that is in this respect. You can do so much more by being a sex worker, being compassionate, understanding and tender with people who are desperate for human touch and connection are just a few of the things that are within your power. Call me dreamer, lefty or whatever, but being able to help other human beings makes my life worth living. It’s easy to donate money to charity, but no so easy to participate for the causes you believe in. Being gentle with those who can’t obtain this from nowhere else is a position people believe is reserved for priests, confidents, doctors and meditation gurus. It’s not; it’s just hard for us to be so vulnerable and we choose to build strong walls around us to avoid getting hurt. Social work and sex work aren’t that far from each other in the right context.

4. You can play various roles and still keep yourself

Sometimes you will have to be an actor with the people who pay you; it has its merits, no doubt, but what’s great about it is that you have the chance to live other people’s lives for a few hours. It’s incredibly rewarding and interesting every time, because even when you’re playing the same girl-next-door role you need to adjust your attitude and every little conversation trick to the person in front of you. And it’s rarely the same person. I was once this cosplay chick with a badass attitude who would order the client to shut the f*ck up and lick it! just to play the almost-shy high class lady who’s showing this man how to live his life and the next morning the fashionista who doesn’t care about social rules while fully respecting them. All those roles were absolutely energy depleting activities that made me laugh but also made me see how society defines itself and its desires based on what it’s been sold.

5. Meet so many interesting people

The chances that you’ll meet sleazy old men are quite high to be honest. But then again, if to be on your knees just to get paid is the sole purpose of your act then most likely you won’t be enjoying it much and you’ll be judging all your customers by a fixed set of characteristics more or less rationally defined (the relationship between you and what your earnings will provide / make possible, where a third party that you need to tolerate in order to get paid – the customer). If, however, you choose to see it with different eyes and try to understand what lies beneath their sexual desire, chances are that you will discover all sorts of interesting wonderful people that need attention and eroticism more than they need to orgasm. I wouldn’t get too personally involved in any such relationship, it’s always better to be professional if it’s a job.

A particularly vulnerable, sensitive and curageous category of such people are those with disabilities. Disabled people usually require more tact and for you to be a truly non-judgemental caring person. I had the occasion to work with a few brilliant people with physical handicaps and it’s always been a pleasure to talk to them, spend time together and help them discover more about their bodies and feelings. They can be more sensitive than other people and it’s only normal that you respect the fact that they are different, but don’t pretend you know them or that you fully understand what they’re going through.

Another notable aspect is that some of the people you will meet are powerful people in high places, sometimes very rich, other times very famous. Being around them and allowing them to enjoy normal sexual fun is not that simple but it’s sure empowering and you can learn a lot from them.

6. I feel sexy and desired

Every time a man or a woman looks at me with passion and desire makes me feel I’m genuinely wanted, that my physical aspect is turning them on and that they are attracted to me. Even when it’s all about the kink, the domination game and the control, it’s still damn sexy to me and it’s a constant validation that I can make lips caress me, hands enjoy my skin, eyes lose themselves over me and real people getting hot about my presence. You may choose to see this as a trivial, Freud-like cold reaction to some childhood issue, but I can honestly say I enjoy it more often than I don’t and I see nothing wrong seeing things this way. And when a couple goes crazy about me doing things to them they don’t dare do to each other and they end up displaying a profound, genuine love for their life partner, I can’t hold back my satisfaction.

7. I’m being spoiled by rich people

Who in this world doesn’t like being spoiled every once in a while? I mean, come on, you’ve done nothing that wrong that you don’t deserve it. A showcase of honest excitement for your body, a good wine at a fine restaurant, best suite in a 5* hotel, a mini holiday on a yacht, in short, being pampered and treated like a queen with many luxury perks are some of the things that do make life worth enjoying for a while. And since everything is temporary, even the half guilt you feel when you’re going home to your regular life, you will have to agree that as long as you’re safe you might as well enjoy this exclusive lifestyle for a bit.

8. I like sex and human touch

It’s true and it’s been a great incentive for me along the way. As far as I’m concerned, liking having sex or being touched by other people can make all the difference, although I’ve heard of quite a few professionals in the industry that even though they don’t like it, they are very professional about what they do and never let their clients see they only do it for the money. I think it’s a bit sad and it can drive you to feel miserable or harm yourself (not necessarily physically). You could end up growing very unhappy with your life and see every such contact as a sacrifice in order to get paid, which makes is all too difficult to handle and perform.

If this industry would be properly regulated and not criminalized, we’d see much less human trafficking and record breaking statistics of less violence against women, not only in this industry, but in the society as a whole. This is something to be educated and constantly checked upon instead of creating a black market where people get physically and psychologically abused, sold, insulted, ignored, imprisoned and whatnot – the possibilities are endless with ignorant lawmakers – instead of adopting laws that are are doing the opposite of helping the sex workers. There’s no one saving me from doing what I want to do.

See “Criminalise buying sex, says Conservative minister Caroline Spelman” – because her main concern while you pay her with your taxes is what you and your client do with your genitals.

You want to join this industry? If you’re in Berlin consider giving this agency a chance and apply for a position. If you’re going on your own, make sure you always have protection – and I don’t mean a condom by that, you should use a condom anyway. Learn what it means to be a professional escort, be confident and never let your guard down. Being professional AND caring AND sensitive doesn’t mean you should allow anyone to hurt you. Learn to say “no” and stick to the safety rules.

This small article has only approached the generally good side of being a professional escort from my own perspective. You should know that there are many downsides as well and you should take your time and document this reality well so you’d know what you’re getting into if you decide to go forward with it. Digg around, ask on Reddit, professional forums and anywhere else you can learn more.

I’m Alejandra, I’m a professional sex worker for Berlin Escort Modelle, you can follow me on Twitter (Fb and Tumblr accounts no longer exist).